Sunday, January 3, 2010

Feeling like I keep writing about sad things...

but it is helping me process. I spoke with my mom today, the Dr told her that they expect she has weeks to months left to live. She is working on accepting that, and told me she and my sister discussed how dad had no problem accepting that he would die. I told my mom that dad had been saying he "lived a good life and was ready to die" since I was 9 years old..and said that for 13 years before he did pass. It made me a bit high strung about him just off and dying when I was a kid, because he was my primary parent, and I saw my mom occasionally on weekends and things. She sounded in good spirits though.

She also told me she spoke with my Uncle..who is really my original godfather and a close friend of the family. I say original godfather because when I converted to the Orthodox Church I also got new godparents. My current godmother likes to joke that it is not often that one person winds up with TWO Greek godmothers in their lifetime. (My original godmother was Greek..I grew up in the Anglican church)

Anyway...my Uncle told her that he is doing ok..all things considered (he is 80-ish) He let her know that his grandson died of an O.D. Hearing this really hurt. I used to go to the Jersey Shore with my Uncle and his grandsons every year. I taught Mikey and Nick how to skateboard...they were amazed by my purple hair, and there were also several pranks pulled between us...they were a few years younger. Last time I saw Mike, a few years back, I told him I knew what he was doing and it wouldnt end well....he said he would be ok...wish he was right.

2 comments:

Hermana Linda said...

It's ok to write about sad things. Blogs are for what's going on and sad things are going on. I'm so glad that you have a way to help process them. I didn't use to comment because I read in Google Reader and I didn't realize how easy it was to click over and comment. Now that I know how, I'll try to comment more. <3

Ron said...

yes...i think maybe it's how to process these feelings, let them be a part of us (healthier, i think, than fighting them), without letting them become us...i dont know...i do hope you are able to find what's best for you. I'll be hoping your mom much peace also.take care